Suayness has bestowed upon me

I lost my mobile phone today!!! that explains the above title. (warning: this entry will be full of endless ranting about unhappiness/ sadness/ tears.)


Anyways, for the funnies first:

Taken at Hans one "fine" rainy day:

can someone tell me what is "Very Strong Coffee w/o water"? Do i get pure coffee bean or coffee powder?

And "Yin Yang"?


i need miracles for me and Marco. Does rainbow brings that? or just that pot of gold at the end of it.

Preparedness:

These few questions been bugging me for the past few nights already and it isnt only work that is bothersome anymore.

- can dogs never die?

- at least not my Marco?

- can they dont fall sick or grow old?

- what if it strucks suddenly?

i have been crying myself silly almost every single night ever since that day. It's like these nagging thoughts that i can't seem to blemished from my head.

i used to always look at my boy and think, he will forever be a pup, at least in my eyes. at the age of 8 this year, he is still very much hyper and jumpy as ever. Also full of energy and running (or rather dashing) around the house. (considering his breed which is well known for laziness, i would almost say he hasnt inherit any of that trait at all)

It just seemed to me that he has sort of aged overnight? coz suddenly, his joints are giving him problem (as mentioned in my last entry) but these 3 wks of weekly visit to the vet for jabs seems fruitful as he no longer move in pain or whines at slight movement. ok, my dog is back to his pup behaviour... or so i thought.

so last wk being the 3rd wk, after his jab, i brought him to another vet for eye check as i noticed cloudiness and the current vet does not have the equipment to check those beautiful peepers of his. i was expecting old age ailment, like poorer eyesight, cataracts... since he was already getting joints aches... so those, i am prepared. but what came out of the nice vet's mouth was... my dog retinal has detached from his eyes. which translate to 100% blindness.

i was in shocked. i couldn't believe that as he is still moving around the house as per normal and doesnt knock into stuff around the house. Reason given by the vet was, this poor fellow had been relying on his other eye and not to mention his other senses to compensate for that blind eye. and of coz, his familiarity to the surrounding of the house has made it fine for him to navigate around. (I had since tell everyone in my family that no major shifting of furnitures are allowed).

This painful truth had struck me so unexpectedly. I have been thinking back alot on the past 8 years. What he was like when i first bought him, all his little habits. Suddenly, i felt i had taken the time with him for granted. My pup is no longer a pup. It saddens me to look at his eyes now especially when his glance is on me.

I fear of what is more to come. Of all the What If.

For now i know for sure, I will never ever be prepared when it comes to my boy.